We stayed in the most luxurious resort I’ve ever experienced, with giant rooms, multiple pools, a gigantic private beach, chauffeured golf carts to take guests around, and many very nice restaurants.
There was limitless lobster, wagyuu beef and Peking Duck in the buffet, and a chef to cook as many banana fritters as you wanted to eat. Amusingly the staff presented bottled water to you before pouring, as if it were a vintage of wine.
A few family members sailed a catamaran and watched another small boat tip over in the strong winds – the lifeguards picked the crew up and took the boat back to shore. It was all very amusing until an overturn dumped the family members into the water and they had to be picked up by the lifeguards. The lifeguards asked one of them to tip the catamaran upright, but he applied too much force and the boat flipped the other way.
Phuket also featured a mini-cultural Disneyland, the centrepiece being a show that had trapeze performers swinging around above the audience, and elephants running through the auditorium.
One of us accidentally hit some kind of government censorship of the internet; it was a bit of a surprise, but we figured it must have been a misinterpreted keyword.
Another bizarre thing was the advertisements for services to help Thai women find foreign men, and foreign men to find Thai women. That was a bit disturbing.